"Artistic expression is blessedly, refreshingly nonessential."

I just read this bold, amazing, scary, beautiful, confronting, passage in my new bible, "Big Magic" by Elizabeth Gilbert (birthday buddies!): 

"And, yes, I absolutely do believe that our artistic instincts have divine and magical origins, but that doesn’t mean we have to take it all so seriously, because—in the final analysis—I still perceive that human artistic expression is blessedly, refreshingly nonessential. That’s exactly why I love it so much."

I smiled, I shook my head in awe, and then, I remembered that a few weeks ago I'd started thinking that it might be a good place to look, a good practice to take on, to think of my music not as a luxury, but as a necessity. As something people need as much as they need the services of a lawyer, or a plumber, or of a PR consultant like my girlfriend (god I love her so much). 

So after reading this passage, and remembering that idea, I thought, hm, why, given the beautiful truth of this new idea, was I attracted to the old idea that music could be a necessity, not a luxury?

Because it allowed me to remove all my own worth from the equation. 

If music is something people need, they'll go out looking for it, and find me, and because I'm good at it, they might hire me. They might be fooled into hiring me, little old me, for this thing because they need it in such a way that they don't care who delivers it. You don't go to a restaurant because you admire the waiter, you know. You need food, so you go get it. Based on the food, not on the people serving or even making it. If the same food was made by a machine or a robot, you'd be fine. (Well, theoretically. Following this logic that I've just made up. Just go with me here.)

And I get to write myself out. Because surely no one would ever care about me, what I do, what I love to do, no one would hire me because I've put myself vulnerably out there, saying "this is what I do, this is what I love, are you interested?"

And it's funny because as I write that it doesn't really seem to make sense. And what I mean by that is IT'S SO GODDAMN SELFISH! It's speaking directly from fear. Indeed, no one hires me for me – or at least, for the part of me that is scared in this way. 

Music, art, is, in Liz Gilbert's words, "blessedly, refreshingly nonessential." Non essential. That doesn't mean wrong, or unwanted. Step out of your artist's fear for just a second and you'll see the blindingly obvious truth that people LOVE art, NEED it, not to live, but to LIVE. Whether it's a deep beautiful novel or a cheap trashy TV show, it's all art, and people don't require it, but they love it.

Where am I going with this, to counter the idea that I wanted it to be essential so as to write out my own self worth? Something about the responsibility you have to accept how great you are, that you are worth making art. And maybe something about Liz Gilbert's point, which I love so so so so so much, that you should make art for yourself only, without any concern at all for anyone seeing it, hearing it, loving it. And maybe that the takeaway for a professional artist in that case is that if you relate to your work that way, as daring and crazy and counterintuitive and illogical as that seems, that's when your fear dissolves, and your life takes off and becomes unbelievably amazing and perfect (and your career too, but inside this attitude career almost doesn't matter anymore and just takes care of itself).

Maybe. I've given up thinking that my ideas like this are the answer or key to anything.

But, I will say, that's what's been happening to me in the past week or two.

Go make something.

Inspiration from... You know what, who cares about post titles!

I love inspiration. I love reading. Since I finished my coach training I've been reading even more of what I like to call "transformational" reading. Right now I'm reading four or five books, off and on (thank God for the Kindle which lets me add to my reading load no matter how much room is left in my backpack and without adding any weight to my body!). Let's see:

I'll fill in the authors later

"Big Magic" by Elizabeth Gilbert

"Conversations with God" by Neil Donald Walshe (my second reading)

"The Way of the Superior Man"

"The Prosperous Coach" (my second reading)

"Different Seasons" by Stephen King

"Alexander Hamilton" by Ron Chernow

Let me make this quick for now so I can stop sweating. (I just got back from the gym and am headed to the shower but I couldn't let inspiration's words go forgotten or unwritten.)

I keep reading the same things over and over. God keeps sending me the same inspirations, about inspiration and creativity. Liz Gilbert, in "Big Magic," is saying things my heart, the universe, God, has been trying to tell me with varying (and increasing) success in the past week or so. The kind of things I want to write about here.

Fear would say "why write about them here? They've already been written about, in so many ways, in so many places. Nobody is going to want to read them from you when they can read them other places. And certainly don't go telling people about these other places!"

But LOVE says, truth says, creativity says, God says: These things speak to you. You are meant to share them. The fact that they are all over the place speaks to their power, their truth, their beauty, and the fact that they are being thrown at you means that you get to be included in sharing them with the world, and sharing their other sources with the world, and changing lives – yours, your readers', and everyone's.

Yes, everyone's.

Join me.